Until lately, domestic violence has been seen largely as a woman’s issue. After all, the vast majority of people suffering from violence by a partner are women.
Along with subtly and overtly blaming women for being sexually assaulted (she shouldn’t have worn that/been where she was/drunk what she drank/said what she said), our society seems to have a convoluted relationship with domestic violence. People don’t usually say out loud that they think the woman is to blame, but they often question why she stays in a relationship where she is being hurt.
It’s not that simple.
And from Emma Watson to Russell Wilson, celebrities are speaking out about how more men need to be involved in domestic violence prevention.
In her passionate speech to the United Nations regarding her new initiative HeForShe, Emma Watson called on men (and women) to stop fighting each other and instead, work together to end gender inequality worldwide.
Both men and women are affected by gender expectations and inequality, and we both need to work for equality and respect.
On the HeForShe website (www.HeForShe.org), you can make a commitment to “Express zero tolerance for discrimination and violence against women and girls, believe in equal access to social, political and economic opportunities, understand that taking a stand for women and girls is taking a stand for humanity, and speak up when you see physical, emotional, or sexual harassment.”
The unique thing about this pledge and campaign is that it’s targeting men to step up and speak out about what have traditionally been seen as women’s issues.
Russell Wilson is calling out guys, too.
His new “Pass the Peace” campaign takes a page from the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. In order to participate, record a video of yourself holding up the peace sign with two fingers, challenge two more people to pass the peace, and throw a ball off-screen.
The next step is for you to take the initiative to make a $2 donation to the National Domestic Violence Hotline. And to make it easy to do that, you can text WNYPassThePeace to 41444. “WNY” stands for “Why Not You?”
And why not you?
Domestic violence is everyone’s problem. When people in our community are hurting and involved in unhealthy relationships, we all are affected.
In that spirit, I’ve made my own Pass The Peace video, challenging Mayor Jim Ferrell and Federal Way Mirror Publisher Rudi Alcott. Over to you, guys — and to see the video, go here: http://youtube/SvmMc3pU6KU
According to the Domestic Violence Awareness and Sexual Assault Services (www.dvsas.org), the best thing you can do if you know someone who is experiencing domestic violence is to listen to that person, believe that person and do what you can to keep that person from getting isolated.
If you know someone who is an abuser, the best thing you can do, if you feel like it’s safe to do so, is to speak out, in order to increase the level of intolerance of domestic violence.
Whether you take a pledge, pass the peace, make a donation, support a friend, or speak out, do something to take a stand against domestic violence and for healthy relationships.
Together, we can make a difference.
Reach out for help
If you are in immediate danger, call 9-1-1
If you need help:
• Domestic Abuse Women’s Network (DAWN) 24-Hour Advocacy and Crisis Line 425-656-7867 or visit www.dawnonline.org
• Lifewire (formerly Eastside Domestic Violence Program), call 425-746-1940 or 1-800-827-8840, or visit www.edvp.org
• National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or 800-787-3224 (TTY) or visit www.thehotline.org
Amy Johnson, MSW, is a trainer, educator and coach in the Pacific Northwest. She is co-author of the books, “Parenting by Strengths: A Parent’s Guide for Challenging Situations” and “Homegrown Faith and Justice.” Johnson can be reached at comments@diligentjoy.com.
