A recent study has shown some remarkable results.
Sexuality education curricula that address gender and power dynamics in relationships are five times as likely to be effective in lowering rates of sexually transmitted diseases and unintended pregnancy as those curricula that do not address gender or power dynamics (www.guttmacher.org/pubs).
Wait. You mean, sex ed is more than “just say no!” on one side and “here’s how to use a condom” on the other? Imagine that.
Students in one Los Angeles area district learn about gender norms while they are learning about puberty, body image, and harassment. Welcome to developmentally appropriate sexuality education.
Learning about gender and power dynamics in relationships lowers rates of unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.
This is more than simply giving information about contraception and condoms — the effectiveness of the programs in the new study comes from youth needing to think critically about relationships, dynamics and communication.
This study didn’t surprise me one bit. I’m just glad that idea is getting more press.
You see, children as young as 8 and 9 already have a really good grasp on what society thinks they should and shouldn’t do or be or act like as male or female — let alone that they should identify specifically as male or female and nothing else.
They already have experienced teasing and mean comments about something they chose to wear, or say, or admit they like to do. They know a thing or two about gender.
If we don’t teach them to think about this core part of who they are — to consider why these things happen, why people and society might act the way we do — then we are leaving them ill-equipped to make important decisions when they become involved in a relationship with another person.
A woman in a workshop I recently led told me she was dealing with teens and adults who did not realize they had been abused as children because no one had taught them those things weren’t supposed to happen to kids.
The result was a cacophony of unhealthy dynamics in their current relationships. Teaching kids about not only abuse, but also about gender and power in relationships, can reduce abuse and increase the chance youth don’t end up with a sexual transmitted disease or pregnant before they want to be.
Even more important than information is the kind of education that’s actually effective in obtaining the results we all want — less abuse, less unintended pregnancies and less sexually transmitted diseases.
The next time you are asked to support sexuality education in school or elsewhere, get educated. Take a look at what’s being taught.
It may be more — or less — than what you think. If it doesn’t deal with gender or relationships, step up and fill in the gap. Below are some resources that can help with those conversations.
Books:
• “Sex is a Funny Word” by Cory Silverberg and Fiona Smyth
• “It’s Perfectly Normal” by Robie Harris
• “It’s So Amazing” by Robie Harris
• “In Our Mothers’ House” by Patricia Polacco
• “Jacob’s New Dress” by Sarah and Ian Hoffman
• “The Family Book” by Todd Parr
• “Will Puberty Last My Whole Life?” by Julie Metzger and Rob Lehman
Websites:
• www.100conversations.org/topics
• www.tolerance.org/gender-spectrum
• www.loveisrespect.org/healthy-relationships
Amy Johnson, MSW, is a trainer, educator and coach in the Pacific Northwest. She is co-author of the books, “Parenting by Strengths: A Parent’s Guide for Challenging Situations” and “Homegrown Faith and Justice.” Amy facilitates classes and workshops in the Puget Sound area and online. She specializes in working with parents and in sexuality education. Amy can be reached at comments@diligentjoy.com.
