Following is a sample from the Federal Way police log:
• Girlfriend beats up boyfriend: At 1:35 p.m. April 29 in the 33000 block of 26th Avenue SW, a woman called to report that her boyfriend had beaten her up. According to the report, upon arrival, the police found the boyfriend outside, with a torn shirt and a bloody hand. The man’s hand was bloodied when the woman bit him. The boyfriend noted he was attacked when he announced his intentions to break up with the woman.
• Video monitoring system stolen: At 7:47 a.m. April 29 in the 2100 block of SW 356th Street, a business owner reported that the business had been broken into. According to the report, the video monitoring system, along with a number of other items, were stolen from the business.
• Wacky theft attempt at Victoria’s Secret: At 1:28 p.m. April 29 in the 1900 block of S. Commons, two suspects attempted to steal merchandise from Victoria’s Secret. According to the report, the duo had foil-lined bags to evade security sensors. When confronted, one of the suspects attempted to flee, but was apprehended after being tasered. That suspect also had a felony warrant out from the Department of Corrections for escape.
• Serial retail thief gets busted: At 3:09 p.m. April 29 in the 2200 block of S. Commons, a man was arrested for stealing $269.95 worth of merchandise from Target. According to the report, the man had stolen approximately $640 in merchandise from a Target in Tacoma earlier that same day. The man had left the Tacoma merchandise in his car.
• Another woman beats her man: At 9:57 a.m. April 28 in the 30000 block of 24th Place South, police responded to a call of domestic violence with a possibility of weapons present. According to the report, the woman involved was arrested for assault/domestic violence and felony harassment.
• Pistol-whipped: At 10:11 a.m. April 28 in the 950 block of SW Campus Drive, a passerby found a man lying on the sidewalk. According to the report, the man claimed he had been released from jail that day, and that two unknown assailants had attacked him and pistol-whipped him. The report notes the man refused to assist in the investigation of his assailants.
• Busted car window: At 8:23 a.m. April 27 in the 1800 block of SW 353rd Place, a woman reported that one of her windows in her car had been broken out. According to the report, nothing was stolen from the car, and it appeared no one had attempted to make entry after the window was broken.
• White collar crime: At 12:22 p.m. April 26 in the 33000 block of 1st Avenue South, a man reported that a manager of a business had embezzled over $10,000 from the business since January.
• Not snitching still got this guy stitches: At 8:41 p.m. April 27 in the 31000 block of 1st Avenue South, a female friend of the victim contacted police to notify them that the victim had been stabbed. According to the report, police contacted the victim, who confirmed he had been stabbed. The victim refused medical aid and also refused to press charges against the person who stabbed him.
• Another great beer heist: At 11:50 p.m. April 27 in the 34000 block of Pacific Highway South, four unknown males entered a convenience store and stole an 18-pack of Corona.